How To Handle Teasing And Bullying At School
Having your child become the target of teasing and bullying at school is a big fear for any parent. If your child has a speech impediment, language disorder, a foreign accent or their own unique speech cadence, your fear may be more likely to become a reality.
Kids seem to have an uncanny ability to home in on differences and vulnerabilities – and point them out loudly without any tact or consideration for your child’s feelings. It’s helpful to have a good understanding of the distinctions between rudeness, thoughtlessness and genuine bullying at school. With these definitions in mind, you can work towards a tool kit of ideas to help make school life a little easier.
Rudeness vs being mean vs bullying
The following sums up the difference between rudeness, being mean and bullying at school and is a great tool to use when discussing this issue with your child.
• Rudeness is when someone says or does something that is unintentionally hurtful and they do it once.
• Being mean is when someone says or does something intentionally hurtful and they do it once.
• Bullying is when someone says or does something that is intentionally hurtful and they keep doing it, even after you ask them to stop or show them that you’re upset by it.
Unfortunately, a speech or language impediment can’t be changed overnight and ongoing rude and mean comments can easily feel like bullying to a child.
The research into bullying is pretty clear: school bullies target timid, shy and withdrawn children. Unfortunately, these traits are common amongst children with speech and language impairments such as stuttering, as well as children with autism and other childhood developmental delays.
5 ways to help your child avoid or overcome teasing and bullying at school
Here’s are 5 expert tips if you’re concerned about school bullying around speech challenges.
1. Work with a qualified and experienced speech pathologist. The earlier your child starts treatment, the better.
2. Ensure your child understands the difference between being rude, mean and bullying. If you’re concerned that your child is being bullied, speak up and talk with your child’s teacher. Don’t be afraid to go higher if you’re not happy with the outcome.
3. Teach your child to speak up if another child is being rude, mean or bullying them. If they do not have the confidence to speak up, teach them to walk away, stay safe and to speak with a teacher or responsible adult. It can be helpful to come up with a list of responses for your child to use to help explain to a teacher what has happened. While they’re feeling stressed, anxious and upset they might find it hard to clearly articulate or find the right words to explain a traumatic experience.
4. Build your child’s sense of self confidence. If you’re stuck for ideas on how to do this, one or two sessions with a child psychologist can be invaluable to give you and your child a set of confidence building tools to work on together. Speak with your child’s GP about a referral.
5. Stay in touch with your child. Make some one on one time each day to spend with your child. Many children, especially younger ones, don’t respond to direct questioning about how their day went, so spend some time listening to them while they play or draw. Some things in life are difficult, allow your child to see and know that you will be there to support and help them through the bumpy bits.
Early intervention with speech pathology for children with ANY type of speech and language difficulty can help to correct many impediments. Just as importantly it can help to give your child the confidence to shine and thrive for the rest of their life, regardless of bullying at school.
